Tour de France

I bet you didn't know that the Tour de France is currently in progress. That's what happens when there is no feel good American story at the Tour.

So here is the only 30 seconds of the race that I've seen. It involves a bike and a dog.

The bike gets the worst of this deal. And apparently the French word for 'smack' is 'smack'.

What Was Once Hated...

... has now become unhated.

You know how there are certain really really good songs that you can't listen to anymore because you've heard it half a billion times. You actively avoid listening to it, skipping it in iTunes, changing the radio station, whatever. You do all that is humanly possible to NOT hear the song, even though you know every word, every odd phrasing, every drum fill.

Let me tell you there is another side. Eventually the song will pass all the way through hatred and come out the other side into some kind of quasi-state of acceptance. Whereby you accept the song as great, that you -in fact- do NOT love OR hate the song, and that this song is a part of your essential being (and probably has been for a long period of time) and therefore inseparable from your immortal soul.

The first (and so far only song) to make this journey for me is "Piano Man" by Billy Joel.

Long Island is the only place in the universe that you would grow up under the delusion that Billy Joel is better than Bruce Springsteen. He's on all the time, on every station. Fits well on the classic rock stations, kills on AOR and its not truly Friday on the island until you hear Piano Man.

I admit that it was the first song I knew all the words to, I played it to death at some point in my life and knew that every bar I would go into there would be a pair of Billy Joel heads in the jukebox declaring that this CD jukebox had both discs of Billy Joel's Greatest Hits.

Then, some time after high school, I started to hate the song (probably because it reminded me of HS and I hated that.) It slowly and slowly became more painful to listen to the song. Even after I moved south and heard the song once a month, rather than once a day, my hatred still grew.

Last week I heard it on the radio I realized that I didn't hate it anymore. Not for the cheesy, predictable lyrics ('sharing a drink they call loneliness, but its better than drinkin alone'); the accordian, nor the la-la-la-didi-da la-la-didi-da-da-da. It had evolved past hatred into that odd acceptance.

That gave me hope. The hope that other really-great-songs-that-I-currently-despise can find their way back into my life.

So, good luck "Where The Streets Have No Name", "Moondance" and the live version of "Freebird". Maybe some day I won't hate you.

Russian Bears (say it fast)

In the past three weeks I went to 2 concerts. My first in 4 years. Tool in Winston Salem, then Rush at the Creek. Both shows outstanding. Best Rush show I've ever seen. They played all the stuff that I love and skipped most of the lame ass 90s stuff. Lots of fun, great weather at the Rush show, nice cool evening but not cold or humid.

Tom somehow turned a simple dog walking into a 2 hours farce. He was supposed to walk Bear when I was at inventory. He tried getting the lead on Bear for 90 minutes, but anytime he got close with it, Bear growled. But if he just wanted to pet or feed the dog, Bear would let him. Tom was able to coax him onto the porch and he peed there.

Bear is a humping machine. I take him to the dog park and all he wants to do is hump everyone there. Its very sad. I wish he'd stop.

Oh My God!

About 5 minutes ago I realized that I had been trained by the dog.

I was sitting at my computer and I called Bear to put his paws on my knees so I could pet him. The instant I started petting him he got down, so I had to follow him to the floor to continue the scratch.

It was then I realized this dog trained me to do that. I hadn't realized until just now that he's ALWAYS done the same move.

I know what he's thinking, too.

**Okay, I'm gonna sorta jump up, wait till the-man-who-feeds-me starts scratching me, then I gonna sit my ass down and get scratched. Fool, food-man doesn't see it coming**

The Great Outdoors

This afternoon I watched a hawk capture, kill, pluck and then eat a small bird. And it happened right outside my back door.

The nameless hawk, lets call him Steve, chased a small bird, lets call him Food, into the bush behind my apartment. Steve caught Food as Food attempted to circle back around. Then Steve sat on a branch holding Food while all of Food's friends chirped like mad.

I guess all of Food's friends were saying, "You're gonna rot in hell for eating our friend!", "Stupid Steve, may your babies become squirrel food" and things of that ilk.

Once Food was dead, or maybe he wasn't quite yet, Steve began plucking the feathers off of Food in order to get to all the squishy bits inside. It was rather cool, the hawk couldn't have been more than 10 feet from me as he was doing this. I had a great view through the bush.

Once I know what kind of Steve it was, I'll let you know.

Dammed If You Do...

Today I had a customer call to complain about our customer service. Apparently she felt that it was too good.

She had not one, but three different people ask her if she needed any help. Then the person at the register had the audacity to talk to her about her purchases. You know, annoying things like, 'ooh, this is a good book' and 'I'm glad this is finally out in paperback.'

In my 16 years of retail, this is the first time I've ever had this complaint. Will our enthusiasm keep her from shopping at our store? Of course not.

I also caught a Mexican trying to steal two latin cd sets from our store, so overall it was a good day.

The Real Enemy

is big pharma. Eventually there will be no more oil. There will never be a time when there isn't something wrong with our body. Unless we all become cyborgs, but with souls.

Here's the little guy (okay, it is a WHOLE country) standing up to the big guys and saying 'suck it.'

They spend more on advertising than r&d. Hell, they are inventing conditions just to sell drugs. "Restless leg syndrome"? What is that?

Wait till we start exploring space. That's a whole other galaxy of diseases to be cured. "Lunaphobia", "Mars Dust Fever" and "Io Rectal Itch".

Would You Do...

Found this site about female sportscasters.

Its rude, but funny.

Ben Folds

recorded a great version of Snoop Dogg's 'B!&#*@s Ain't S*!t'. To turn it into a piano ballad, aka Air Supply, is brilliance. If anyone really wants it, I can put it on a mix cd for you. I cant figure out how to link songs.

A Long Time

Its been a while since the last one, things have changed. I now have Bear. Jamie's dad broke his leg and they couldn't have a dog running all over, so I took him.
He's sleeping now, he follows me every where. Its a bit creepy sometimes, but he's cool. And since he's 9 or so, he's completely house trained and not active like a puppy. Perfect for a lazy bastard. Like me.

Tried to see Blades of Glory tonight for free, but the guy in front of me was the last one in the theater. So that sucked. Maybe next time.

Run out of ideas on making song lists in iTunes, now just making lists of all songs with certain letters in them.

You Tube: Return of the Bride

this gets good after the bride comes in

I've just found out that this video was staged. Darn.

New 7 Wonders

In humanity's quest of the ultimate list they have decided to allow everyone with access to the internet to define the New 7 Wonders of the World. Please vote, because if you don't, the terrorists have already won.

A Question

Say a customer, who used to be an employee 7 years ago, continually calls you by someone else's name, are you allowed to correct him if you don't remember his?

God Save The Playoff!

Two things I love. Chuck Klosterman and College Football.

He's right you know, this is the same reason I love College Football.

Long Time Coming

Its been a while since I posted anything and just wanted to post this. Great video, that its in spanish is even better. Man I loved this show.

Adventures In Dog Sitting

The weekend of Thanksgiving I dog sat for Jamie's dog, Bear, for 5 days. He was just about the perfect dog, he slept alot, he never 'went' in the house and he was generally a cool dog. But I learned alot from the experience.

1. I would have to buy a better vacuum if I get a dog.
2. Some dogs poop more than once during a walk.
3. They like to pee in the same place over and over and over again.
4. It was fun to have company all the time, it felt like I wasn't talking to myself.

I did miss him when he was gone, and suprised myself when I went looking for him the first day he left.

I do wish I could keep him for a longer time, but my plan to get a second job to help pay for Europe, would keep me out of the apartment for 12 hours some days and that wouldn't be fair to me or to him. Then there's the monetary issue. I just can't afford a dog, even a small one, right now.

If I could find a way to keep him I probably would. I could use the daily exercise of walks, I'd never sleep past 9am again and I'd never have to worry about picking up crumbs anymore.

Sigh

This might have been the best Word ever. If he doesn't win the Emmy next year, I will hunt and kill Barry Manilow. Who's with me?

You Tube: Part 2

Another reason why You Tube rocks, and another person with too much time on his hands. LINK.

Etaoin

Only because it came up at work today link.

Fuck Yadier Molina

Well, I can finally write about the Mets now that the season is over. I have a couple of superstitious fears that things I do affect the way my team plays. The main one being writing about them.
I know deep down, if I write/gloat about my team, they will fail, especially once the playoffs begin. This fear began way back in 1988 with the Mets. I knew they would win the World Series that year, they were the best team in baseball and it had been just 2 years from the last one. This one was another sure thing, just like 86, but then they lost to the Dodgers and it was another light-hitting, defensive minded catcher that crushed my dreams. So, Mike Scioscia, fuck you too.
Ever since then I am frightened that if I talk about how good my team is, they will lose. It resurfaced again in 99 with Duke. 37-1 going into the final game, they had rolled everyone all season long. I knew I was watching history, their 38th win would be a record for D1 schools, most of the stars were underclassmen and would be returning the next year. Back-to-back was a sure thing. Wrong, enter fuckin UConn. Fuck Jim Calhoun.

So now I take care in what I do, say and even wear when my teams are on. The more important the game, the more care I take. During ACC games, I've been known to change my shirt, change the chair that I'm sitting in and during one season I made origami cranes constantly while Duke was playing.

After watching the recent Game 7 from my chair, my couch, standing, etc. I've begun to realize that what I do has no effect on how my teams play, but it isn't going to stop me from trying.